A George Foreman, a little hamburger and sweet tea!

"Now you're cooking!!!"

This evening I conquered something new! Sure, it will probably seem asinine and unimportant to you! But I have to admit once I had it mastered I couldn't help but feel a little more like a bonafide SAHM!

This little story begins last week when I went to my Mom's for dinner and MAN was it good! She whipped up a grilled chicken salad and breadsticks faster than you could say "I'm hungry." I walked into her kitchen and as usual watched in awe as she tackled making a meal in a matter of 30 minutes flat. But this time was different from the hundreds of times I'd seen her do this same feat. I thought to myself, "I've got to learn this stuff now, for real. I'm going to be a Mom. And I want to be a good one, like my Mom." I did something I have pretty much never done before. I said "Mom, show me how you get things together so quickly. It takes me forever to pull together a meal, like a legit meal that has multiple sides."

This seemed like a good meal to start with for my first lesson. I mean salad and grilled chicken with bread sticks, it can't be too bad. I expected baking, chopping of course and other daunting meal prep tactics.

Don't get me wrong, I've been cooking for the past three years of my marriage and I cooked when I lived on my own in my apartment before that. But I've never really mastered my Mom's ability to have everything ready all at the same time, without anything getting cold. It's always amazed me. It's like she's a kitchen ringleader and the meal components are her various attractions. She gets the meat to jump through the hoop and it's done just as the mashed potatoes and green beans are taking their last steps across the tight rope. End result; one excellent show!

So, when I asked my mom to show me, I was a little nervous! She was going to reveal to me one of her mysterious motherly secrets. I stood waiting, anticipating what she'd say, what mysterious strategy she might show me to produce a meal in the manner of perfection I'd grown up knowing!

"Sure D (her pet nickname for me) I mostly just use this thing that Grandma Presley gave me a while back. It's a neat little grill. Let me show you how I do this."

My jaw dropped. I mean literally, it dropped. I felt like someone was going to pop into the room at any moment and say "DUH!!!!" How could I have missed this? She'd been using a small George Foreman! For years! It almost felt like cheating!

I didnt say much as she demonstrated cooking the chicken one piece at a time, slicing it mid way through being cooked and then putting it back onto the George Foreman to make the slices of chicken a little more seared. She lightly seasoned with a Mediterranean  seasoning and dictated to me quickly to "chop three tomatoes, peel this cucumber and then dice,  and chop this green onion into small pieces."

She took three plates out while the chicken was cooking and spread a leafy green salad mix onto each one. Then she had me distribute the chopped vegetables and shredded cheese evenly between the three plates, and as I finished sprinkling the cheese, she slid the last slice of chicken onto a plate. Quickly she distributed the chicken between the three salads, and then told me to grab the dressing as she carried two of the plates to the table. I carried the last plate, set it down and then poured drinks.

Helping her cook that meal stunned me. I'd cooked many times in the past by myself and failed to get the sides done anywhere NEAR in sync with the meat. By the time I'd finish the sides, my meat was cold and had to be reheated, or worse overcooked and disappointing. It wasnt long before I shied away from doing the traditional meat and two sides setup and got into combination/conglomerate meals where you prepared ingredients and mixed. Spaghetti, lasagna, tacos etc. I never thought to really ask my Mom just how she got everything ready at the same time. It seemed so simple and I was baffled with myself for always getting the timing wrong.

Now it turned out, she'd had a secret weapon I'd never known about. She'd use her George Foreman to cook the meat once she had the sides started and could open the lid of the grill to slow down the cooking of her meat to match the prep time of her sides, or vice versa, close the lid and press to speed up the cooking temp. It just seemed so simple that I felt like a fool. Once I got over this reaction I thought, I have GOT to get one of these things. And then came the real kicker.

I told my husband this same story (in a much abridged version) and waited for his stunned reaction.

But.... I didn't get one.

"Babe. We have a George Foreman. It's been in the pantry since before we got married. I've told you a couple times you should try it. My grandmother gave me it to me when I got my own apartment. It's brand new in the box. We've never even opened it before."

Double take! "What???" Clearly, I had no memory of him ever telling me that we had this miraculous mystery machine in the pantry right? I mean, well... not that I'll ever admit at least! :)

Now we've arrived full circle. Tonight after running errands this afternoon, hitting the grocery store for what felt like the millionth time and finishing up my Christmas shopping, I was exhausted. Justin had put in a special request for homemade hamburgers since the great Pope household George Foreman discovery! I'd moved hamburger over from the freezer the night before to defrost and once the groceries were all put into their respective places I stood facing the stainless steel contraption on my counter.

"Ok." I told myself, "Time to show this thing who is boss." Talking to a grill, awesome right?

But I was intimidated by the task of getting a meal together in the same manner of awesomeness as my Mom. After all, she'd always thrown down the gauntlet. And now that I had this secret weapon she'd always used, I knew it was sink or swim.

See, if I couldn't make a meal that measured up to her perfect timing with her secret weapon, how was I going to make it as a Mom, and a Stay At Home Mom at that??? This was a huge hurtle in my mind to becoming confident in my new role.

I plugged it up. My fingers itched to dial my Mom and put her on speaker phone. What would it hurt to have her coach me through this whole process. I knew how to cook, I just needed a timing coach! No one would ever know but me and her. But I resisted. This felt important to me. Conquering this gleaming machinery and delivering all the components at the same time felt like a huge test of whether or not I could make it in this new role of my life. I was determined not to fail.

So I pattied up a pound of hamburger into four hamburgers (making my husbands slighter larger than the two I knew I would eventually be eating between today and tomorrow) and I threw a little soy sauce, garlic salt and oregano onto the patties. I could smell the heated metal, the smell filled up my nose and I knew it had to be at max heat. I opened the lid and threw the four burgers onto the grill, shut the lid quickly and made sure the drip pan was in place.

I must have opened that lid forty times to nervously glance at my hamburgers! But I set to work, sliced tomatoes, pulled out the pickles and got the buns out. I had preheated the oven to 400 before plugging up the GF, so I pulled out the bag of frozen seasoned fries and spread them on a small pan.

Suddenly, I had a whim! I stuck a pot on the stove filled with water and checked my burgers again (for the 41st time). I popped the season fries into the oven and set the timer. The water had reached boiling by this point so I dropped two teabags into the pot and pulled it aside to let it steep. I checked the hamburgers again (for the 42nd time) and popped the hamburger buns into the toaster after seeing they were just about ready. I pulled down a glass pitcher and measured out the sugar into it. The timer went off for the fries and I set them to cool on the counter, poured the pot of tea minus the tea bags into the pitcher and stirred in cool water.

The buns POPPED up from the toaster and I pulled the burgers off the George Foreman and onto a plate.

I shut off the oven, unplugged the GF and turned off the burner. It was mesmerizing. Everything was done, everything was hot! I looked around to exclaim what a good job my Mom had done and found no one in the kitchen, or the whole house for that matter but me.

What?

I'd done it. Not the normal chaotic scramble to get things ready that I usually went through only to be disappointed by cold sides or overcooked meats. Not the conglomerate food menu item I stuck to so loyally.

I'd made a meat and one side, AND sweet tea all at the same time. Granted I told myself, hamburgers and frozen fries are not that big of a deal. But still. Everything was ready and hot. And I'd made tea at the same time.

Slowly, a small smile played across my cheeks as I put my hamburger together and then put the fries onto the plate. I put the leftovers away for later and I sat down and took a bite. A big fat tear trickled down my cheek. How absolutely embarrassing, right? I'm crying because I accomplished a hamburger and frozen fries? Lame!

But I knew it wasn't really about that at all. My life had changed. I'd done what I'd seen my Mom do. I hadn't just made a meal. I'd prepared a feeling, I'd grilled an emotion and baked a mood. I'd made my house feel like a HOME!

You'd think I would have encountered this before in my three years of being a wife. But there was a difference to this experience. I was warming the birds nest. I was bringing in worms to dangle for my young. Preparing this meal both pregnant and with the mindset of a woman whose sole domain was her home and kitchen was something different all together from what I'd ever done before.


Next time, I mused to myself, Next time I'll do it with an apron!!

"You're using cloth diapers? Eeewwww.."

Most frequent comment when telling people you plan to cloth diaper; "You're going to do cloth? Oh, no way I could do that. It's not worth the work."

Once the decision was made that I was going to stay at home and I found out I was expecting, I immediately started asking myself "What can I do to make things easier on us financially as a family?" After all, Justin and I both agreed that while we don't mind making certain sacrifices and working hard for the past few years to put us at no debt, we don't want to "just" make it! So I started looking at all the small ways you can effectively cut the cost of living by doing a little more work!

I happened to work with a fabulous girl named Kari who was planning on staying at home with her own child! Now I could never measure up to Kari as far as all the ways she strives to save money for her family. This woman is a lean, mean, money saving, do it your self machine! Coincidently another woman that I worked with, Jennah, ended up using cloth diapers as well. I started asking her questions, along with my friend Kari and from there decided to investigate this whole cloth diaper movement myself. I attended an event in Charlotte called "The Great Cloth Diaper Change" where there were vendors for different cloth brands, Moms who used cloth diapers full time and an event to have the most people together at the same time on the same day to change cloth diapers around the country. It was a pretty fun way to learn about the cloth diaper choice and all the brands out there.

After lots of good advice, many, many questions asked of my friends that i'm sure were annoying, and some discussion with my husband, I decided to make the plunge! I went ahead and ordered all the cloth diapers i'd need. I decided to go with two brands to keep my inventory varied and so I wouldn't have to commit to one brand in case I ended up liking assets from multiple kinds. 

Now I know when you think cloth, you think of the old fashioned diapers that our grandmothers used. The kinds that were a square of fabric that had to be folded and then pinned. The baby had to wear rubber "pants" to seal in the mess. And that's what I had always envisioned when I heard "cloth diaper". But after seeing what my friend was using, going to the diapering event and seeing the brands there, I was actually AMAZED at how much they had changed over the years. I researched on the internet the different brands and types of cloth diapers and found two that I liked that were well recommended to me by my friend! I went with the brands BumGenius and Kawaii Baby and chose the "Pocket Diaper" style. 

Pocket Diapers are diapers that look just like a disposable. They have an opening on the inside back of the diaper where you put in an insert or soaker that literally soaks up all the urine and liquid mess. The inside of a pocket diaper is lined with a special material that wicks away moisture and mess from the baby's bottom and stays dry with the exception of solid waste. I have literally seen a soiled urine diaper that my friend's baby wore that unless you checked the soaker insert it was impossible to tell the diaper was  dirty. 

When you change the baby's diaper you pull the insert out of the opening in the back of the diaper or the "pocket" and put both the outside diaper (called the diaper cover) and the liner into a wetbag (a special bag made of a material that conceals smell and won't sour) until you get home! If you are at home you'd put the dirty diaper cover (the outside diaper) and the soaker liner into a diaper pail that has a bag with the same material lining it. According to how many diapers you have, you'd then wash all the dirty covers and liners in the wash. 

So, that's just a brief over view of the way a cloth pocket diaper works. I have yet to use them myself on my own child, but I have watched other moms in action with their babies. There's an abundance of things out there to make it even easier on you as a mom! Once the baby gets older and the waste more solid you can use something called a diaper sprayer. The sprayer hooks into the plumbing outlet on the back of your toilet and mounts to the wall. You use it to spritz a dirty diaper and get the solid waste out of the diaper and into the toilet before putting it into the diaper pail or wash. I personally will use mine ASAP just because I like the idea of spritzing my diapers out before letting them set in the pail. 

As far as how many you need, thats another area where Moms have told me that it just depends on how easy you want to make things. Some Moms cloth diaper with only 10-12 diapers, and they wash every day. My friend who originally gave me all my information personally had a large amount of the diapers because in the beginning she planned to go back to work full time and had to have a lot in order for her day care to let her use them. I personally have about 45 diapers! I chose to buy this many because I wanted the freedom to wash every three days or so, even though i'm at home full time. 

Along with cloth diapering I am going to be using cloth wipes. I have about 150 wipes total to work with! After doing my own research along with the amazing advice of my good friend, I decided to go with making my own solution to "dip" or "presoak" my wipes in! It's a very simply process. You just take an empty disposable wipe container and add a few drops of an EO (Essential Oil, I personally went with lavender on my friend's advice) and a small amount of Doctor Bonner's Magic Soap Tea Tree scent. Then you just add water up to the line of the container and swish it around. Drop in your wipes lastly and let them soak and set in the solution! This way they stay moist and are ready to use. From what my friend has told me this supplies you for a week at a time, but keeps you from using stale solution!

I can't tell you how many times I've told someone about the choice to go cloth and heard about how gross they think it is, or how they cant believe im going to do all that work. But I personally felt like it was a small trade to:

A.) Save us around $1500 to $2000 a year per child

B.) Use a more natural eco friendly system that's easier on a babies skin and

C.) Do a little more work for a product that I believe makes life better in general for my children and myself.

Just two weeks away from my son's due date, I've got all my diapers "prewashed" (something you have to do with brand new diapers ONLY, you wash them 5-6 times in advance in order to let the material build up absorbency) and ready to go! I'm sure there are doubters out there thinking, "Ok, when this chick actually has to do it, she's going to change her tune really quick." But anyone who knows my husband knows that once the money is invested, we're committed. There's no turning back because there is NO way my husband would let me get away with investing the money into the diapers only to quit!

SO the big question is, "How much did you invest in cloth?"

Total with purchasing 45 diapers and 150 cloth wipes we spent approximately $545.00

The additional accessories we purchased to make diapering easier but are NOT necessary to cloth diapers are:

Diaper Sprayer- $50

Spray Pal- $21.50

(an item that shields the diaper and keeps water from splashing when you spray, also allows you to drop the messy diaper into the diaper pail without touching ANYTHING, there's a link on my facebook page)

Wetbags (3)- $42.00

Diaper Pail Liners (2)- $32.00

(as far as a pail, we just purchased a stainless steel trashcan SimpleHuman brand with a push pedal opener, but you can use anything for this, a metal bucket, old trash can etc.)

So total, if you decide to go with all the extra's like we did, the cost is approximately $690.50! There are cheaper brands and styles that you can chose to adjust the cost according to your budget.

That sounds like a lot of money right? But compare it to the average cost of disposable diapers and wipes which is $1500-$2000 PER CHILD each YEAR. 

Children are often not potty trained until the ages of 2 or 3. That's $4500 per child over three years at LEAST. 

The cost of cloth is one time; $690.50 spent once, and usable for more than one child. If you have two children and you go cloth, you save an average of $3809.50 PER CHILD! That's pretty significant and in our opinion TOTALLY worth the extra work! 

Now that I've shared the details of what I have learned about cloth diapering and the journey to my arrival at the decision to go cloth, you can wish me luck on my excursion into the world of cloth! 

Before you think it's gross and not worth the work consider the amount of money it saves, along with the eco friendly aspect and the natural benefits it gives your child! I'm not saying disposable is wrong or bad, just that cloth is not what people think it is! Going cloth does not mean you NEVER can use a disposable. Several of the people I know who use cloth will tell you that they still use disposable every once in a while for a long car trip, etc. I know personally, I have disposables that were bought for us at showers that I plan to use for a long car trip where it is a little more inconvenient to change your baby while being on the road. It is all up to you and how you want to do it. I have a variety of sizes that were bought for us and so should I find it necessary to use one I know I have them and wont be needing to spend the money buying any. 

I may also find I dont ever use disposables, even the free ones I have in stock! We'll just have to see!

That being said, just wanted to share the information I have gathered about this very big decision of how I want to diaper my child. It's always good to know every available choice thats out there, and thats why I wanted to blog about this particular subject this evening. For some reason the idea of doing things differently than others and the fact that by doing a little extra work I am contributing financially to our budget even though i'm not working any more makes me feel good about this decision i've made. 

Being a parent is most often described to me as an adventure! All I can do is try to make the best choices possible and embrace all the wild and crazy things I'll go through in this journey of becoming a mother! Goodnight all!

Change is coming!

“Nothing is so painful to the human mind as a great and sudden change.”  Mary Shelley


Don't take this quote in the wrong way! The changes that I face in the next few weeks are from the most beautiful and wonderful gift that any woman can be given, the gift of becoming a mother. But all the same, the changing of one's life is never an easy thing. The death of one role and the birth of another is something that makes us nervous, forces us to move forward, challenges us and shapes who we will become.

This year is the year of big changes for me. My husband and I decided in March that it was time to start a family, and a month later in April we found out that we were expecting! We were excited, scared, nervous, overjoyed and terrified all at the same time.

Now here at the end of my pregnancy, I'm facing the reality of all the HUGE changes that are about to happen for us as a family and more importantly for me as a woman. This blog is an attempt to put into words my journey of How I Became A Mother.

I am over 37 weeks pregnant and expecting a boy. His name is Chase Levi Pope and my husband and I are thrilled to welcome our first child into the world on the possible due date of December 17th. I was working as a teller at State Employees Credit Union, where i'd been employed for 6 years when we made the decision to start our family. After discussing the cost of day care, insurance and the costs that go along with having a child in daycare, Justin and I made the decision that I would stay at home with our son.

I come from a divorced family, while my husbands parents have been married over 35 years and I have to say when we made the decision for me to stay at home, I was pretty nervous. I felt vulnerable and nervous about being financially dependent on my husband after being in the work force since I was 16. But at the same time, I knew that I wanted to be home with my child more than anything. I am blessed with a very financially wise husband who has worked vigorously the entirety of our three year marriage to put us in a "zero debt" position. With my car being paid off in the month of November, no credit card debt, and a tremendous amount of equity in our home that allowed us to refinance and lower the payment by more than half, we were actually in a position to go down to one income without causing financial strain or stress on us as a family.

At 36 weeks I went in on a Tuesday to see my doctor for my weekly checkup. They'd been hinting that they wanted to slow down my progression and were considering pulling me out of work early, but I never really thought I'd be pulled out of work before my due date or delivery date. I had let my boss know that I would not be coming back after my allowed maternity leave time and everything was on schedule. When I went in on that Tuesday my doctors made the decision to pull me out at 36 weeks for the remainder of my pregnancy due to swelling, losing 3 pounds from the previous week, and being dilated 1 cm and effaced 40% for the second consecutive week.

That's when everything really hit me.... Before I could really absorb it, I was packing up my things, counting my cash drawer, calling HR to let them know i'd be going out early, and saying goodbye to the girls I'd worked with for the past six years. Now here I am, at 37 weeks, adjusting to being a full time at home wife and soon to be mother. Actually seeing my husband, talking to him and having the ability to be around him more than two short days a week. Our schedules have always been opposite and for the past three years i've struggled with loneliness, frustration and isolation because our time together was so limited. Now, being at home I have the freedom to FINALLY see my husband without a schedule getting in the way. It has been fantastic! Any fear of letting go of my job has been dissolved by the many wonderful parts of being at home full time.

My life has changed dramatically in the last week and a half and it's still yet to change any day now exponentially. I am on the precepice of becoming a mother and in that moment when I finally see my son for the first time, hold him and smell him, I know I will be breathless and madly in love. I go through moments of nerves and then others when I can barely comprehend the sheer awesomeness that i'm approaching giving birth to my child. As frightening to the human nature as change can be, the expectation of giving life to my own child is even more powerful and wonderful. I know that I am blessed beyond measure and that there are so many wonderful things ahead of me.

So, I'd like to invite you to follow me on this journey. To follow me through sleepless nights, tears, laughter and sheer joy. To join in on the passage of a girl letting go of the last threads of her own youth and picking up the needle to weave the tapestry of my son's. This is a journey that I know will change me, mold me, test me and in the end make the person i'm meant to become. I would truly love to share it with all of you!